1.2 Keeping Your Secret

The treadmill. 

 

Go to work, acquire money, survive, so she can go to work, acquire money, and survive.

Can there be more? Or will life always be like this?

"If I had passions or something, like art or a cause I wanted to devote my life to, I'd probably go crazy knowing how little free time we have," Alex confides in Daniel, the next time they're out together. 

 

 

This time they're at The Overlook, which is not the name of some swanky club or anything, but merely one of the island's many parks. Daniel has already had his fill of sight-seeing since he arrived in Sunlit Tides, with his wife Mary-Sue, but he's willing to keep that quiet and indulge Alex for a little while. He's learned Alex is very much into nature.

One time she showed up to work without shoes on, told Mango she "liked to feel the Earth under her feet", and their mental patient of a boss actually accepted it as a valid excuse. 

 

"The base does keep us really busy," Daniel agrees, after a silence where he was contemplating something other than their conversation, "but it's the life I signed up for."

"I guess I'd be proud of myself too, if I were a pilot," Alexandria muses, thinking about how complicated those fighters are to operate, and how fast one's reflexes must be to handle one.

"You can be proud of your rank too," Daniel reassures her. Alex is a lowly grunt, but he's not wrong. There's a certain amount of pride she can take in being able to at least pass the physicals required for her rank.

 

After a few hours bird-watching Daniel can take no more of it, and persuades Alex to go with him to Purple Rose. 

 

"You're a bad influence on me," she giggles, having allowed Daniel to lead her straight to the bubble room.

"It's the fastest way I know to unwind," he says.

 

Alex wants to say she wasn't wound up at all, after several hours cuddling and identifying parrots, but it would be a lie. Something is off, leaving her unsettled in a way she can't name. Things aren't clicking with Daniel, and while that certainly isn't the end of the world, she's struggling with how to tell him. 

 

Is there a way to tell him they should just be friends, that will make things go back to normal between them? This romance came about so suddenly. It seemed they were just out for drinks after work, being sociable and complaining about their boss, and then they were kissing and he was giving her a massage.

No, she decides. There are no magic words that will control Daniel's reaction. Either he will find it easy to go back to just being friends, or he won't. He's entitled to his own feelings on the matter, whatever they may be.

 

The sun is setting. Daniel wants to take a dip in the hot tub.

 

Alexandria is more exhausted than she thought. She snuggles against Daniel, smiling contentedly at his touch. The warm water, the skin on skin...

 

"This is really nice," she says. "I don't want you to think it wasn't."

"Why would I think it wasn't?" His gaze lingers on the beaded necklaces that adorn her swimwear outfit, how they've settled onto her breasts.

"I just think the two of us aren't the most compatible people."

"Oh." He winces. "You didn't want to go clubbing. I shouldn't have pestered you into it."

"You didn't want to go birding, but you immediately said yes," she counters, keeping her tone soft.

"I... guess you could tell." Daniel frowns. "You're not interested because you think I was faking having a good time today?"

"It's more that we don't have a lot in common... not that I'd want my future husband to be a copy of me or anything... um... it's just..." 

"It's okay," he interrupts her. "You don't owe me a reason. Thanks for telling me." His words are sincere. As much as he wants to have Alex, it's a bit of a relief to have this end now, before anyone finds out, before consequences can catch him.

 

Daniel isn't surprised when she pulls herself away from his chest, but he is surprised when she looks over that bare chest, her desire so obvious he can practically taste it in the air. 

 

"As long as we agree things are casual, though..." she can't finish her sentence, a hiccup stops her.

 

"You just... want to blow off some steam?" he offers.

 

She does.

 

They give in to their impulses, each believing this will "get it out of their system", as the cliche goes. The woohoo in a public hot tub is quick, and clumsy, not helped by how the bubbles have affected their minds. It is, however, satisfying.

They both leave the club feeling good about themselves.

Daniel returns home to his wife, who looks him over with exasperation and asks where he was. 

 

"Swimming, to keep in shape," he answers, before he sweeps her into a deep kiss. 

 

She glares, but accepts the affection, returns the kiss. They've been having problems; she pushed for the Sunlit Tides assignment, hoping the romantic location would inspire Daniel and revitalize their marriage, but he has spent hardly any time with her. He's obsessed with his career, as always. Mary-Sue is not sure how long she can live with this.

"You want me to be more affectionate, but when I am, you sulk," he complains, as he nuzzles her neck.

"I'm not sulking," Mary-Sue sighs. "I just hoped you'd be here before I had to eat dinner without you."

 

She knows nothing, Daniel reassures himself, as his wife smiles and caresses him, and what she doesn't know can't ever hurt her.

 

 

 

The following week is filled with warm tropical rain, off and on, turning day into an unsettling twilight for an hour or less at a time before things clear up again.

 

 

 

Alexandria's day started well enough, with her promotion to squad leader, but the waves of nausea that harass her that afternoon make her doubt if she really wants this responsibility. Clearly it's giving her anxiety!

 

However, the cause of the vomiting is pregnancy, and once Alexandria figures that out, she knows she must tell Daniel. She manages to get him alone behind the barracks at work to give him the news.

He is not thrilled. "No one can know about this," he warns her. "I'll chip in for financial support, but please, leave me out of parenting. I want no contact with your child."

"But it's your child too," Alex says, confused. She didn't think a man who went on about carrying on his father's legacy would be so eager to abandon his own child.

"No, it's not. I messed up in the hot tub, I wasn't thinking. That doesn't make me a father. It makes me a gene donor. Blood isn't what makes family! Please, Alex. We aren't in love. I don't want this complication. Don't make things more difficult than they have to be," he pleads.

 

She can't argue with most of that, but it still strikes her as off.

When she presses him further, Daniel spins her a tale about how he's with a new woman now, and he's afraid she'll call things off if she knows he's about to have a child with another woman.

Alex cocks her head to the side. "You said it yourself, we're not in love. I'm not a threat to her."

"You know how women are."

"I clearly don't."

"She'll think I still have feelings for you, or she won't want the risk of being a step-mother..."

"So you'd rather lie to her instead of letting her make an informed choice about you?"

 

"Mind your own business," he snaps. 

"Okay," Alex replies sadly. She returns to the mess hall without another word. 

Sunlight pours in through the four bedroom windows, with no curtains to stop it. The sounds of waves crashing against the rocks at the base of the cliff shake this house all day. Seagulls scream, sometimes in the distance, sometimes close.

 

 

Alex wakes in the morning with a knot in her chest, after barely sleeping at night as she considered her options. She has so little to offer a child. Taking Daniel to court could provide a bit more financial security, but it would also make him furious with her, as he was so clear he wanted no official ties to her baby. She might be able to trust him to provide help in an unofficial capacity, as he said he would, but he could also be lying. He might be planning on ways to dodge that responsibility. Or worse. He could find ways to make her life hell, ways to make their child's life hell. It would be better if she could cut Daniel out of the picture entirely, she thinks, if he's going to be spiteful. 

 

Growing up in foster care and group homes taught her well enough how irrational people can be in these situations, and she doesn't want to risk that negative energy demanding to be in her child's life later down the line. If Daniel gives her money, he could at any point decide he is entitled to see the kid... right? Or is she being paranoid? She isn't sure.

 

It would have been one thing if he's reacted calmly to the pregnancy, but his desperation to keep it a secret from his lover, and from their coworkers, has Alex feeling so uneasy.

With nobody else to talk to about this, Alex drops by her boss's house. Pregnancy will affect how she's able to work, and she'll need accommodations, so she does need to tell him about it sooner or later.

Maru congratulates her, and promises to add a toddler division to their ranks. They need new recruits, he says, they need to buff up their space program in case they need to fight aliens. He tells her he trusts her with this information as she is his second in command, his first underling to have arrived on the base.

"Second in command, huh? That's news to me... does that come with a pay raise?" she quips.

"It's a secret." Maru smiles darkly. "We can't trust the others. We need to test their loyalty."

Alex stares at him. He's too insane for this to be a test.

"Do you have our personnel files here?" she asks, risking her professional career by exploiting her boss's psychosis, "I have my suspicions about some of them and I really need to check something."

 

It doesn't take much more to get Maru to give her access to all of the base's restricted information, and use of his personal computer. Of course there isn't much here. Someone is above Maru, and that someone knows he's insane and would never give him much to work with. Perhaps there's a real conspiracy here, somewhere, but that's not what she's here for. 

 

She's here to look at Daniel Pleasant's records.

"I know," she hisses, after getting Daniel to meet her at the base after hours. "You're married. You have been married since before you moved here."

"I wasn't hiding it," he says, flashing his wedding band at her.

"You knew I didn't know!"

Daniel lowers his head. "...Yes, I knew."

"What's your next lie going to be? That your wife is into being cheated on?"

Daniel takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly as he considers what he should say. He settles on truth, on his version of it anyway. "What I did with you helped convince me Mary-Sue is the one. I don't want to hurt her. I never meant to hurt you either. I'm just an idiot."

"Damn right you're an idiot. If you think I'm keeping your secret, you're wrong."

Daniel clenches his fists. He is a large man, strong enough to be rid of this woman and all the problems she represents. He could bash her head in and toss her body into the ocean. But the dark thoughts pass. He could never lay a hand on someone like that. Not for a selfish reason, not for any reason.

She saw his tensed muscles, though. She takes a step back. "I want you to stay away from me and my baby. Just what you wanted! But I'm telling Mary."

"Mary-Sue," he corrects.

"Whatever!"

"What makes you think she'll believe you?"

"Maybe she won't, maybe she'll take your side and call me a liar. I don't care. I'm doing what's right."

"You're risking your reputation. This is a small town, everyone will assume you knew about Mary-Sue when you got into bed with me. Or into a hot tub, as it were."

"Don't even. People have already seen us out dancing and drinking and... ugh. They didn't know you or me from anyone else."

"Because we're new here. But that will change..."

"So? They've already seen us! What does the baby change?"

"They won't remember if you just drop this quietly."

"...What the hell? You open your mouth, and all that comes out is lies. I can't believe I didn't see you for what you were before. You disgust me, Dan."

 

Alex has already e-mailed Mary-Sue the pertinent details. All of Daniel's arguing and excuses are in vain. The Pleasant marriage almost collapses over this, but ultimately Mary-Sue gives Daniel another chance for the sake of their newborn son, Jeff.

Alex thinks Mary-Sue is making a mistake, but it is Mary-Sue's mistake to make.

Alexandria cannot be seen as weak by "the men" (some of whom are women), so she never stops working. She's too exhausted to do anything after work though, so when she gets a raise the first thing she does is purchase a television set, so she can sit at home and stare at it instead of going out. From the cooking channel she learns how to make key lime pie, which has always been her favorite...

 

 

 When she goes into labor one night, there is no one around to help her.

She makes it to the hospital in time to give birth to a daughter.

Alex names her daughter Flora, in recognition of the only other things she's successfully nurtured. 

 

The house already feels much warmer with Flora in it. 

Alex promises Flora she will protect her, and love her, and always be there for her.

 

__________________________________________________________

Etc.:  In Sims canon, Daniel and Mary-Sue Pleasant do apparently have marital issues, but they end up staying together and have twin daughters with awful theme names. (Angela and Lilith? Really?) In my game, Daniel pollinated Mary-Sue shortly before pollinating Alexandria, and they have a son now, a blatant departure from sims canon.

Daniel has the flirty and commitment issues traits. I wasn't considering him to be Alex's mate until he began flirting with her autonomously. She still needs to get three more kids from somewhere though, since I rolled for 4 of them.